Microwave Cooking with Joey

[LoathedVermin72]

In this thread, Joey will entertain and enlighten us with his encyclopedic knowledge of microwave cooking. Ask him anything.

[Chris_H_2]

joey, i just bought a mail-order heritage turkey at $25/lb, but i can't be bothered to take the time to properly prep and cook it in a traditional oven.

how many minutes per pound should i plan on staring at that thing rotate until it becomes utterly unappetizing and inedible?

[epilogue]

joey, i just bought a mail-order heritage turkey at $25/lb, but i can't be bothered to take the time to properly prep and cook it in a traditional oven.

how many minutes per pound should i plan on staring at that thing rotate until it becomes utterly unappetizing and inedible?

You shouldn't have bought that turkey if you didn't have time to properly prepare it.

[LoathedVermin72]

Joey, what is the best color for a microwave to be? White? Black? Stainless steel?

[Chris_H_2]

joey, i just bought a mail-order heritage turkey at $25/lb, but i can't be bothered to take the time to properly prep and cook it in a traditional oven.

how many minutes per pound should i plan on staring at that thing rotate until it becomes utterly unappetizing and inedible?

You shouldn't have bought that turkey if you didn't have time to properly prepare it.

i didn't say anything about a lack of time. it's more of a lack of a give-a-shitter.

[doug rr]

joey, when mircrowaving a finely marbled ribeye, do I need to flip it over halfway through?

[epilogue]

Your microwave should go with the color scheme of your house/apartment, Verm. In a pinch stainless steel is best because it goes well with just everything.

But you should really fucking color coordinate if you're not an asshole.

[LoathedVermin72]

joey, when mircrowaving a finely marbled ribeye, do I need to flip it over halfway through?

[Chris_H_2]

#rockbottom

[epilogue]

joey, i just bought a mail-order heritage turkey at $25/lb, but i can't be bothered to take the time to properly prep and cook it in a traditional oven.

how many minutes per pound should i plan on staring at that thing rotate until it becomes utterly unappetizing and inedible?

You shouldn't have bought that turkey if you didn't have time to properly prepare it.

i didn't say anything about a lack of time. it's more of a lack of a give-a-shitter.

A heritage turkey does not afford one such an attitude, friend.

[epilogue]

#rockbottom

I can't see this image. Please try again.

[epilogue]

joey, when mircrowaving a finely marbled ribeye, do I need to flip it over halfway through?

I've never microwaved a finely marbled ribeye, doug. I'm guessing you probably wouldn't though. But I'm not sure why you'd put a ribeye in a microwave to begin with.

[Strat]

I think doug rr is pimping you, joey.

[epilogue]

So I shouldn't continue to be honest in this thread? Wait... is this thread just some big joke to you guys?

[LoathedVermin72]

what do you think? be honest

[epilogue]

I think I'm being used.

[Jorge]

You have big shoes to fill viewtopic.php?f=10&t=3787

[Strat]

I think I'm being used.

I think you're beautiful.

[epilogue]

I thought we already had a microwave thread.

[E.H. Ruddock]

MERGE!