Simpsons Bible Stories

It is an unseasonably hot Easter at church, and no one is interested in Reverend Lovejoy's sermons. When the collection plate is passed round, Homer puts in a chocolate Easter bunny that he found in the dumpster, enraging Reverend Lovejoy, calling it a wicked idol, and provoking him to read the Bible from the beginning. The Simpsons all fall asleep.

Marge's Dream

Marge dreams that she and Homer are Adam and Eve. They peacefully live in the Garden of Eden until a snake (Snake Jailbird) tempts Adam into eating dozens of apples from the forbidden tree. He persuades Eve to try one when God (Ned Flanders) witnesses his sin. Even though Adam ate many apples, God only caught Eve eating an apple, and she is therefore banished from the Garden of Eden. Adam is unwilling to come clean, but misses Eve and thinks of a way of getting her back in by digging a tunnel with the help of some of the animals. God's unicorn, named Gary, becomes exhausted from the digging and dies just before God catches Adam trying to smuggle Eve back into the Garden. The death of the unicorn enrages him further, and he expels them both from the Garden of Eden.

Lisa's Dream

Lisa imagines she and all the other Springfield Elementary students are Hebrews in ancient Egypt, with the Pharaoh (Principal Skinner) making them build a pyramid. Only Moses (Milhouse) can liberate the Hebrews. When Bart defaces the Pharaoh's sarcophagus, supposedly incited by the burning bush, he gets the other students punished. Lisa helps Milhouse produce plagues to scare the Pharaoh into freeing the Israelites; they fail. This in turn gets Lisa and Milhouse thrown in a Pyramid prison. When they escape, Milhouse gathers all the students and they attempt to leave. When they reach the sea, Lisa has an idea to get across: They simultaneously flush all the Egyptians' toilets to drain the sea. As they cross, the Pharaoh and his guards follow, but the water fills the sea back up and swallows them. They enjoy splashing each other, and then return to the shore. Pleased that they have escaped, Milhouse asks Lisa what the future holds for the Israelites, but Lisa disappoints Milhouse when she says that they have to wander the desert for forty years. Milhouse then asks if it is going to be smooth sailing for the Jews after that. Rather than disappoint Milhouse again with news of the ongoing anti-Semitism that will plague the Jews for many centuries, she distracts the crowd by sending them to search for manna.
Homer's Dream

Homer pictures himself as King Solomon. Lenny and Carl fight over ownership of a pie. King Solomon cuts it in half, sentences Lenny and Carl to death, and then eats the pie. King Solomon then presides over a civil case between Jesus and Checker Chariot.

Bart's Dream

Bart sees himself as King David, who kills Goliath, but has not won the war yet: Nelson is Goliath II, Goliath's son. Goliath II has killed Methuselah (Grampa), David's oldest friend. In retaliation, David challenges Goliath II, but having no stones to sling at him, David loses and is catapulted from the city. David then meets Ralph, a shepherd, who claims he can kill Goliath II. Ralph dies, which enrages David even more. He then trains to try to slay Goliath. Having to climb up the enormous Tower of Babel beforehand, David manages to kill Goliath by throwing a lit lantern down his throat. Goliath is surprisingly still alive, but is quickly killed by Ralph's gravestone, hurled by Ralph himself, who also had not died. Much to his shock, David is sent to jail as the townspeople claim that Goliath was the best King they ever had, building roads, libraries and hospitals. The dream ends with a title card that reads "A Bart Simpson Dream".
Ending sequence
As the family wakes up, they find themselves alone in the church. Upon exiting they realize that the Apocalypse has come; fire rains from a red sky, and the Four Horsemen ride past. The Flanders ascend into Heaven, but The Simpsons do not; Lisa begins to ascend, but Homer grabs her ankle and pulls her back down. Instead, the Simpsons descend via a staircase into Hell, where Homer follows the delicious scent of barbecue. The episode ends with Homer screaming in agony (because there are no hot dogs, there is pineapple in the coleslaw, and German potato salad) as "Highway to Hell" by AC/DC plays over the credits.

The PTA Disbands

After a failed attempt at a school field trip, which appears to have caused the apparent abandonment and brutal beating of the student Üter, Edna Krabappel calls an emergency strike on behalf of the Teachers' Union of Springfield Elementary, to protest against Principal Skinner's miserly spending on school supplies and activities.

As the teachers' strike results in the closing of the school, the various student characters respond to the sudden turn of events in their own ways: Lisa becomes increasingly obsessive in her desire to be graded, Milhouse is forced by his parents to take private tutoring lessons (which improve his education), Jimbo Jones finds himself immersed in the intricacies of daytime soap operas with his mother, Dolph and Kearney become easily bored with video games, and Bart revels in his newfound afternoon freedom and annoys many Springfield citizens by imitating other people to make them angry or hurt each other. In particular, Bart does what he can to keep the union and Principal Skinner at odds with each other. The two sides are at an impasse; the union wanting a restoration of funding and Skinner maintaining that even with the spending reductions he has made, government budget cuts have squeezed the school dry.

After some prompting from an exasperated Marge Simpson, the parents of Springfield eventually decide to take matters into their own hands, and recruit volunteers from the community to take over as temporary teachers. This turns out to be even worse for the students than before the strike, especially as Marge becomes Bart's new teacher after Skinner learns he has chased away previous substitutes including Moe and decided he needed use her to keep Bart in line. Jasper becomes Lisa's new teacher and gets his beard stuck in a pencil sharpener, which makes her worried about not being able to get into her dream school Vassar College. Due to Marge's excessive mothering of Bart, he grudgingly resolves to force the strike negotiations forward. Together with Milhouse, he tricks both Krabappel and Principal Skinner into entering Skinner's office, which he then locks behind them. After spending several hours trapped together "like prisoners" in their own school, the two are mutually inspired with an idea to create extra revenue for more school spending. Things return to normal with the old teachers in charge, but with the school cloakrooms having been rented to the Springfield Prison. Each classroom now features several full prison cells at the back, which have the added benefit of keeping the more troublesome students in line. Snake Jailbird makes a deal with Bart to get him out of prison, promising him to "make it worth your while", to which Bart responses shortly afterwards "I'm listening".

Some great lines in PTA disbands

I've had just about enough of your Vassar bashing, young lady


Lisa, in this house we obey the laws of thermodynamics!

That's a paddlin'


I forgot how good this episode is

Yea Stip, I think this one is an easy vote for the PTA ep.

I think Bible is a very good ep, but I'm giving it to PTA.

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