The Boy Who Knew Too Much

On a sunny day in Springfield, Bart is not excited about going to school; in part because he has to travel there on a prison bus, sit in new chairs that are very uncomfortable; and even more so when Ms. Krabappel informs the class that they will spend two hours longer than usual at school that day (due to Bart tampering with the clock). When arriving at school, Bart forges a note claiming a dentist appointment so that he can skip school, but Principal Skinner is not convinced. Skinner chases Bart through Springfield, and as he finally corners him, Bart jumps into a passing car. The car is driven by Freddy Quimby, nephew of Mayor Quimby, who is going to his birthday party at the Quimby Compound, which Bart crashes, claiming to be Mayor Quimbys nephew "Bart-Bart". At lunch, Freddy is served chowder, but he ridicules the waiter for mispronouncing it in a French accent, even though Freddy himself mispronounces it with a Boston accent. He then follows the waiter into the kitchen, and apparently roughs him up. Bart, hiding under a table, secretly witnesses the true turn of events. Freddy is charged with the crime, presumably assault and battery, and is put on trial.

During the trial, despite Quimby's attempts to rig the trial, the whole town seems to believe that Freddy is guilty due to his demeaning behavior and intolerance of how every person around him says "chowder"; he even threatens to kill his own lawyer and the jury for it. Only Bart knows otherwise, and he confesses to Lisa that he's the only one who knows that Freddy didn't actually assault the waiter. He doesn't want to testify, however, because the only way Bart can confirm that Freddy is innocent is by admitting that he skipped school, and thus would face punishment from Skinner. At the trial, the jury consists of Homer, Skinner, Hans Moleman, Ned Flanders, Helen Lovejoy, Jasper, Patty, Apu, and Akira.

Homer votes against the others because he wants to create a deadlock so that the jury is sequestered at a hotel with free room service and cable television. In court, Lisa convinces Bart to testify, and Bart tells everyone that Freddy did not assault the waiter (he insulted him but after the waiter snarled back at him, Freddy seized an expensive bottle of champagne and left the kitchen without any violence) but that the waiter injured himself in a series of clumsy actions. The offended waiter attempts to deny that he is clumsy, but in the process, he trips over a chair which causes him to fall out of the window into an open-roof truck filled with rat traps, thus proving the point. Freddy is cleared of all charges, and Skinner, although praising Bart for being honest and coming forward, reminds him that this does not change the fact that he skipped school.

Despite Bart's logical argument that his act of selflessness nullifies his misbehavior and that leaving him in peace would be the fairest thing to do, Skinner decides to follow through on his main instinct of being rule-bound and inflexible, and gives Bart three months' detention after school. At night Marge tries to talk to Homer about the things he missed at home but he continuously tries to fool her with his fake eyeglasses. However, Marge sees past this and Homer finally admits to missing being at home with her.


Itchy and Scratchy Land
Bart and Lisa see a commercial for an amusement park named Itchy & Scratchy Land, and immediately want to visit it. Marge has already booked a family vacation to a bird sanctuary, but after revealing that the theme park has a place for adults, Bart and Lisa win their parents over, on the condition that they will not embarrass Marge as on previous holidays. After a long car journey, they reach the Itchy & Scratchy Land parking lot, where they are then flown to the park by a helicopter and told by the pilot that nothing can "possibly" (he pronounces it "possi-bligh," then hastily corrects himself) go wrong.

Marge is slightly uneasy with the many references to violence at the park, but has an enjoyable time visiting the various violent attractions, which include a parade filled with Itchy and Scratchy robots. Homer and Marge eventually tire out and spend time away from the kids at the nearby "Parents Island" as Bart and Lisa continue having fun. Bart and Lisa also visit a movie theater, where a documentary about the history of Itchy & Scratchy is being presented, including clips of the old Itchy & Scratchy films "Scratchtasia" and "Pinnitchio". Although going well, the family's vacation is ruined when Bart launches a stink bomb into an actor's Itchy suit and is arrested by park security. When Bart arrives in a cell, he finds Homer, who is in there for kicking another Itchy character "in the butt." Marge is informed of her son's and husband's transgressions through the park's public address system and is immediately embarrassed.

Meanwhile, Professor Frink, chief of the animatronic robots in the park parades, tells the other staff that (according to chaos theory) all the Itchy & Scratchy robots will turn on their masters; this happens seconds after he makes the announcement. Bart and Homer are released and just as Marge is lecturing them, all power is cut and a horde of Itchy and Scratchy robots advance towards them. One of the park staff refuses to let them escape on the helicopter with them due to Homer and Bart's misdeeds at the park. Homer frantically throws everything he can at them and discovers that the flash of a camera short circuits the robots' systems. The Simpsons then grab dozens of cameras from a closed gift shop and defeat the entire Itchy & Scratchy army. The family is thanked for saving the park and agree that it was their best vacation ever. Regardless, Marge demands that they never speak of the trip again, as she is still embarrassed by the actions of Homer and Bart.

oh man, both of these are sooo good.

I'm voting for Itchy & Scratchy Land, though it's tough. It has that great joke about "With a dry cool wit like that, I could be an action hero..."

But this is a good argument for the other episode:

I still quote this when one of my colleagues asks me a question to which I don't know the answer. It distracts them from the fact that I don't know the answer.

Boy Who Knew Too Much is an easy vote for me.

Same. Voting for this clip, but again these are both outstanding