Lisa's Sax
Homer and Bart watch a TV movie called The Krusty the Clown Story: Booze, Drugs, Guns, Lies, Blackmail and Laughter, which reveals that Krusty won four Emmys, but they keep getting interrupted by Lisa playing her saxophone in her bedroom. Homer asks her to stop and Lisa responds that she has to have an hour of practice every day. Bart enters Lisa's bedroom and tries to grab the saxophone from her, but he inadvertently tosses it out the window. It lands in the middle of the street and is run over by a car, a truck, and a man riding a tricycle, and stomped on by Nelson Muntz. In a period of mourning, Lisa reveals she cannot remember ever not having that saxophone, so Homer recounts the instrument's origins.

In a flashback to 1990 (or 1992), Bart goes to his first day of school, but things do not go so well for him. Bart's initial enthusiasm is crushed by an uncaring and bitter teacher who says that he would be a failure at life, and he draws a violent sketch of his feelings. Marge becomes worried that something is truly wrong with him. It is during discussions of Bart's future that the school psychologist realizes the young Lisa completed a complicated puzzle of the Taj Mahal, telling Homer and Marge that they need to nurture her gifted spirit. They try to send Lisa to a private school but the tuition fee costs $6,000. Meanwhile, a terrible heat wave hits Springfield and Homer saves $200 to buy an air conditioner. Marge, however, asks Homer not to buy one until they figure out how to help Lisa. At the school, Bart talks with his future friend Milhouse and makes a farting sound, which Milhouse finds amusing. Encouraged, Bart entertains a group of children with rude words and when Principal Skinner tells him to stop, Bart replies "eat my shorts" and starts humming the Batman theme, replacing the word "Batman" with "Buttman", setting out on his path to become the school prankster.

On his way to purchase a new air conditioner, Homer discovers that a musical instrument is a way to encourage a gifted child, and subsequently sacrifices his air conditioner money to buy Lisa her first saxophone. He asks the clerk to engrave on the sax: "Dear Lisa. Never forget your daddy loves...", but finishes the sentence with a "d'oh!" as he drops the saxophone by accident. In the present, Marge mentions that there is some money in the air conditioner account. Homer complains that the house has had no air conditioner for many years, but decides to buy another saxophone for Lisa, which was inscribed, "Dear Lisa: May your new saxophone bring you years of D'oh!" Lisa then plays the saxophone hook from the song "Baker Street."


Bart vs. Australia

While in the bathroom, Bart notices that the water in the sink always drains counterclockwise. Lisa explains (not entirely correctly) that the water never drains the other way except in the southern hemisphere, due to the Coriolis effect, but Bart does not believe her. To confirm this, Bart makes phone calls to various countries in the southern hemisphere. Lisa points out how expensive international calls are, so Bart decides to make a collect call instead. He calls Australia, where a little boy answers the phone. Pretending to represent the "International Drainage Commission", Bart is informed that the toilet and sink are both draining clockwise. Frustrated, Bart asks him to go and check the toilets of the neighbors. The call takes six hours to complete, since the boy lives in the outback, and Bart forgets to hang up the phone. Later, the boy's father is billed A$900 (referred to as "dollarydoos"). The father calls Bart and demands that he pay, but Bart only taunts him. Unfortunately for Bart, the father's neighbour is a federal Member of Parliament, who reports Bart's offense to the Prime Minister—who is relaxing naked in a nearby pond.

After a long series of ignored letters, Australia indicts Bart for fraud. The United States Department of State wants to send him to prison in order to placate the Australian government, but Marge furiously objects to this idea. The State Department then settles on having Bart publicly apologize in Australia. The family is sent to Australia and they stay in the American Embassy, which is fitted with all the comforts of their home country, including a specially modified toilet that overcomes an exaggerated Coriolis effect. Then they start exploring the local culture.

After Bart makes his apology, the Parliament reveals that they want to give him the additional punishment of a "booting", which is a kick in the buttocks using a giant boot. Bart and Homer escape and the family flees to the American Embassy. After a prolonged standoff, the two governments propose a compromise to the Simpson family: one kick from the Prime Minister, through the gate of the embassy, with a regular shoe, believed to be a wingtip. Marge is opposed to the idea, but Bart agrees. However, Bart dodges the kick, moons the Australians with the words "don't tread on me" written on his buttocks, then hums "The Star-Spangled Banner". In a scene reminiscent of the Fall of Saigon the Simpson family flees the outraged country in a helicopter. Looking down on Australia, they see that bullfrogs have begun to overpopulate and destroy the Australian ecosystem, due to a bullfrog Bart left earlier at the airport. Viewing the devastation, the family remark upon the destruction that can be caused by introducing a foreign species into a new environment, and laugh at the Australians' misfortune, unaware that a koala is hanging onto the helicopter. The camera zooms in on the koala, ending with a close-up of its eye, implying that America will face a similar fate as Australia.

Recently, I've nearly cried watching the episodes with young Bart and Lisa. Having kids does weird things to you.

Bart V. Australia