I mean should they be slutty or demure or free thinking or conservative or ambitious or reserved or outgoing or shy or what. very often I guess it feels like the world conspires against women regardless of behavior so I would appreciate some sincerity here.

Also note: I'd rather this not turn into: well men have a rough time of it too, you know. because I don't look to negate that fact, only to explore what's the deal with expectations of women for now

feel free to post about typically shitty feminine qualities here also. I'm quite sure there's pages worth of them.

boobs

thanks, Doug, for getting this off to a thoughtful and interesting start.

smart career driven women do it for me..

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I think my brother broke up with his last girlfriend because she was more successful than him and he found that intimidating.

Probably a whole lot of what makes a good man. Intelligent, confident, makes good money, fit, active, optimistic, still curious about the world, fun, funny, finds me funny, nice and a high eq. Appreciates a man for what he brings to the table, is not pessimistic nor does she feel conspired against. And as doug rr said "boobs". A good rack is a good thing.

serious part of post: After a ten year marriage that ended with her infidelity but was also riddled with mistrust and an obvious hierarchy, I wanted someone who was experienced. By that I mean, unfortunately, someone who experienced the bad in a relationship so they knew, like I did, what to look for and hope for in a good partner. My wife went through a ten year relationship that ended much the same way as mine. I think we've found in each other someone who can understand what the other went through and have been able to understand each others' insecurities. That, along with the life experience that comes with age has made it great. Getting into a long-term relationship in my 20's was the worst thing I ever did in life.

not-so-serious part of post:

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True story: I dated a girl once who had two different sized ones. Like significantly different in size.

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is there anyone one formula to make a desirable woman?

The older I get, the more I appreciate rich.

i think this is a trick question, guys

i don't know. i felt on a board filled with men, of some various ages at that, although more younger than older, it would be good to find out some of the more common traits guys look for in women that are generally agreed upon as being worthwhile of interest other than just great tits etc.

i think i'm also looking to get some insight into some of the double edged swords of worthiness as well: an exaggerated example, but lots of guys (maybe most guys?), want women who are sexually interesting and interested in lots of sexual activity, which is fine - everyone likes sex. but there's the concurrent idea that women who openly like as much sexual activity as men are whores and sluts and ok to be used for fucking and dumped on shortly there after having sex.

it's always been a bit of a puzzle, hasn't it? at least to me... how does a woman both enjoy an active and rigorous(?) sex life and still maintain an aura of respect and 'not a whore'-ness?

there's other examples, of course, but that one's pretty obvious.
how do women be strong independent thinking humans who are forthright in opinions and actions without risking labels of bitch or ball buster or I don't know what terms are used (although I'm sure many have been used towards me). and labels are damaging, make no mistake about it.

men who are aggressive in business are rewarded... women? not so much. there's a standard of behavior women are expected to uphold in a business environment that seems like a good deal of contradictory actions.

ill speak for the older side of the equation

women my (our age) enjoy sex so i dont think it will really be a problem finding one who enjoys it. as far as what i personally am looking for (still) is someone who :
is open and honest
isnt needy or worried if i dont text her back within 2 minutes of her last text
if something is wrong tell me. I will ask you but if you say you are OK i am not going to nag you about it. i will take you at your word.
a sense of humor would be ideal to.
doesnt take herself too seriously
i understand you (may) have kids and totally understand that plans change at last minute, just let me know

those are all the general traits i am looking for (and im sure i could come up with quite a few more and maybe i will add to them later). while everyone wants someone they find attractive you cant just say blonde, blue eyed and bit tits. its kinda like watching bad porn. i may not be able to describe it but I will know it when i see it

a good response, thanks peeps

and thank god nah's here, I'm eager to read his analysis of my thread.

fingers crossed for references to my dried up womb and total desperation regarding finding a man!