There are some pretty cool moves though

Yeah, the red letter videos nail the prequels. I do think that everything they did poorly, Crystal Skull did worse. And I do appreciate their intention to do something unique to themselves.

this thread:

sorry burt

Burt-hurt

i actually miss the fucking time when this was a Pearl Jam message board. That's how bad its gotten.

Burt wants a Conan Thread.

Without changing too much of the plot, here are five things that could've improved the prequels (beyond getting someone else to direct, someone else to write dialogue, and someone to build some fucking sets):

1. Treat the midichlorians as a controversy, and you create some tension inside the Jedi order.

2. Split Padme into two characters, so that there's some tension in Anakin's love life (unfortunately, probably doubles the amount of "love" scenes).

3. Make the wars and battles have some actual weight by killing actual people (clones and droids don't count).

4. Trim all fight scenes by 65%.

5. Age up Anakin, get rid of Qui Gon and give Anakin all of his parts, and get rid of all the OT characters that make appearances besides Anakin, Obi Wan, and the Emperor.

what about baby luke. can we keep baby luke?

I think Yoda is also acceptable.

those are all really good suggestions

I debated on Yoda, but yeah, we can keep him in a smaller capacity. I always liked the idea that he was always a hermit, and that young Jedi had to seek him out, retreat from society, and sort of give themselves up to something greater. Yoda in a city, chatting it up with senators and power brokers just doesn't gel for me.

6. Don't kill children a movie and a half before you are supposed to turn to the dark side.

I agree with 1 and 3, but not sure about the others.

It would be interesting if elements of the jedi order served the Republic, but it did not encompass the entirety of the order.

and it wouldn't be bad to go back and eliminate the idea of a jedi academy that you're in for like 15 years. I have no problem with that per se, but it does call into question how Luke became a jedi after like 3 days of training with Yoda

1. That was weeks

2. He didn't remotely become a Jedi. Not until the end.

Can I try to convince you?

2. I always thought it was awful that we knew who Luke/Leia's mother was going to be, and that she always presented as this paragon of justice, compassion, and so on. Padme doesn't come across to me as a real person; her only conflict is a totally bizarre one ("I can't get busy with a guy because I'm a senator"), and we're obviously meant to read Luke/Leai's parentage as half good and half bad, and that just seems lazy. Why not have two daughters in the Naboo royal family? One can be just like Padme, and the other can be a "bad girl," and she can actually tempt Anakin into forsaking his vows, being selfish, etc. And it's not until the end of Episode III that we find out which becomes the mother of the Skywalkers (if we find out at all).

4. I'm talking both length, scope, and number of people involved. These things just seemed to go on forever, and considering (3), there just didn't seem to be many stakes. Trimming them will help us get more invested in what's happening on screen, and nothing was more boring than Jedi cutting through battle droids.

5. What role did R2 and 3P0 serve in the PT? What about Jango/Boba Fett? Chewie? These roles could've easily been written for new characters or completely cut, and nothing would've been lost. In fact, by adding new stories instead of relying on, "You know who this character is, let's just move on," things could've been more lush. Of course, this all relies on better character creation/writing--Christopher Lee was wasted here, and Grevious was just a big pile of mess.

7. Actually use the phrase "killed the children" instead of "killed the younglings."

Totally agree with this. The Geonosis Battle sequence in "Clones" is a great example of this. It was way too long, poorly shot and choreographed by an infant. There's no real focus. It's just spectacle for the sake of spectacle.