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 Post subject: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:20 pm 
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In this thread, we submit pictures or text for RM to review and collectively determine: is this person justified/being reasonable, or are they just being a dick?

For everyone's sake, try to keep your sources anonymous, and don't post about other RMers. This is for stuff you find out in the internet wilderness or situations you encounter IRL.

Once you've reviewed each submission, you can cast your vote by quoting the post and saying "Dick" or "Not a dick". Optionally, you can expand on why.

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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:22 pm 
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RM, I submit your first case. Is this person being a dick?

Quote:
Here's a question... my husband & I are vegan, have been for 21+ years. Anyone we know well enough to have them at our house knows us well enough to know that we are vegan for the animals' sake. We do not want any non-vegan products in our house (I understand some people have leather shoes, etc - that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about food). I understand that sometimes people just don't quite think it through, but how do we tell friends/guests this without sounding... I don't even know what the right word is. We certainly don't want to make anyone uncomfortable, but at the same time, this is our house, & if people bring non-vegan food items in, it makes us EXTREMELY uncomfortable. For instance - & this has happened twice, with 2 different people - friends have brought their kids for one reason or another, & without asking, brought a disposable mac & cheese thing for their kid. And then used our microwave to heat it up. We are thoroughly disgusted by this. We didn't say anything, because we didn't know what to say & didn't want to make anyone feel bad, but for the future, we'd like to make sure that people - especially those with kids - know that it's NOT OK to bring non-vegan food to our house. We are perfectly happy to feed our guests, & I'm sure our friends were just thinking that they didn't want to put us out & that they wanted to feed their kid, which I totally understand. But I'd like to head this off at the pass for next time... Thanks.

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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:25 pm 
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Only had to read the first sentence to know that these people are dicks.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:27 pm 
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Self wrote:
Only had to read the first sentence to know that these people are dicks.

Yeah I hate married people

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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:30 pm 
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theplatypus wrote:
Self wrote:
Only had to read the first sentence to know that these people are dicks.

Yeah I hate married people

Uh huh. They think they have it all figured out and their kids are usually dicks, too.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:33 pm 
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They're not being dicks.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:36 pm 
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Douchey, but not dicks.

Douchey is when you are so into your own shit that you can't see how unreasonable or obnoxious you're being.

Being a dick is just being shitty to be shitty.

It doesn't seem like they're doing the latter, they just have their heads shoved so far up their own asses that they can't see how unreasonable they are being.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:37 pm 
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Though if they didn't mention it at the time it happened and instead just made a passive aggressive fb post about it, then they are dicks.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:38 pm 
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bart wrote:
They're not being dicks.

Correct, they seem to be stopping just a cunt hair short of dickdom.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:45 pm 
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My vote is: dicks, and here's why.

Certainly everyone should be allowed to set rules about the food and beverages they have in their own house, which should should be respected by guests. If someone were kosher, I would not bring pork over. If someone were sober and didn't want to have alcohol in their house, that is a completely reasonable boundary to set and communicate to people. However, here we're talking about a person who, in extremely sanctimonious and dramatic language, expresses their "extreme disgust" at someone heating up a mac&cheese in their microwave to feed their kid. They're not talking about someone using their cast iron to fry bacon. Just heating up powdered cheese cups in a microwave. Kids are picky eaters, and the friend was thoughtful enough to bring their own food over. This person secretly resents them for it and posts about it on Facebook later.

Yes, your home is your space, and you are free to set your own boundaries. But some boundaries are fucking dumb. The distinction between douche and dick is well taken, but in this case I'm OK with declaring them dickish.

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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:47 pm 
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If they feel that strongly about it, they should tell their friends and family about it in advance. Even if they are being dicks, it is better being honest. It is their home.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:47 pm 
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bart wrote:
Though if they didn't mention it at the time it happened and instead just made a passive aggressive fb post about it, then they are dicks.


True.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:51 pm 
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theplatypus wrote:
My vote is: dicks, and here's why.

Certainly everyone should be allowed to set rules about the food and beverages they have in their own house, which should should be respected by guests. If someone were kosher, I would not bring pork over. If someone were sober and didn't want to have alcohol in their house, that is a completely reasonable boundary to set and communicate to people. However, here we're talking about a person who, in extremely sanctimonious and dramatic language, expresses their "extreme disgust" at someone heating up a mac&cheese in their microwave to feed their kid. They're not talking about someone using their cast iron to fry bacon. Just heating up powdered cheese cups in a microwave. Kids are picky eaters, and the friend was thoughtful enough to bring their own food over. This person secretly resents them for it and posts about it on Facebook later.

Yes, your home is your space, and you are free to set your own boundaries. But some boundaries are fucking dumb. The distinction between douche and dick is well taken, but in this case I'm OK with declaring them dickish.


Yeah, good point here. That probably pushes it into dick territory.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 12:54 pm 
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Should I change the thread title to "Is This Person Being a Douche"? I didn't mean to stick to rigid definitions; the basic question is "are they being rude / obnoxious / wrong / unreasonable". Dick felt right but if douche fits better I can change it. Yeah I said dick felt right. You can take that to the OOC thread.

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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 1:04 pm 
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Most of those mac and cheese cups also don't have cheese in the cup--you add the cheese after the water is heated, so it's not like they're even heating the cheese in the microwave, no chance of splatter.

Source: I cook 10 of those things per week for my daughter.

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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 1:08 pm 
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Simple Torture wrote:
Most of those mac and cheese cups also don't have cheese in the cup--you add the cheese after the water is heated, so it's not like they're even heating the cheese in the microwave, no chance of splatter.

Source: I cook 10 of those things per week for my daughter.

WHAT IS YOUR VOTE

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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 1:12 pm 
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My vote on the first case:
They're dicks for inviting carnivores into their home to begin with.


Also, Orthorexia Nervosa house parties are THE WORST.


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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 1:17 pm 
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theplatypus wrote:
Simple Torture wrote:
Most of those mac and cheese cups also don't have cheese in the cup--you add the cheese after the water is heated, so it's not like they're even heating the cheese in the microwave, no chance of splatter.

Source: I cook 10 of those things per week for my daughter.

WHAT IS YOUR VOTE


The secrecy of our ballot box is the cornerstone of our democracy.

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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 2:11 pm 
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People being dicks in their own homes is fine, except they shouldn't have guests in that case, or should give a clear outline of how they expect guests to behave, which would probably take care or having guests over in the first place.

If they host people in their house, they are obligated to bend over backwards at times to make them feel welcome, not expect them to adhere to the exact lifestyle they themselves do, that's dickish.

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 Post subject: Re: Is This Person Being a Dick?
PostPosted: Mon July 31, 2017 2:25 pm 
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malice wrote:

If they host people in their house, they are obligated to bend over backwards at times to make them feel welcome, not expect them to adhere to the exact lifestyle they themselves do, that's dickish.


Guest rite is a sacred tradition.

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